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You Suck! So You Should Stop Being An Artist by Khairul Ehsani Sapari


Yeah, you heard me. Think I’m joking? Nope. And no, I’m not just trying to get your attention. By the way, if you’re a successful artist, this article isn’t for you. I hate you. Go away. Now move along...… Still here? Alright, let me tell you why you should stop being an artist.

Let's address the elephant in the room: as an artist, you suck. You're not exactly selling like nasi lemak. No matter how many paintings, sculptures, or prints you produce, they're just not flying off the walls. The occasional red dot on your artwork's nameplate might have felt like a victory, but let's face it, those moments were few and far between. So, what do you do? You keep pouring money into canvas, paint tubes, and brushes, convincing yourself it's an investment for the future. But in reality, your studio space is slowly turning into a dusty storage unit, filled with unsold creations that seem more like burdens than assets.

And we're just talking about those random open-call group exhibitions you eagerly enter every time you had a chance. Now, let's discuss the art competitions you've participated in. How many awards have you raked in since your debut as an artist? Been a finalist? Honorable mention? Invited to participate in a finalists exhibition, only for your artwork tucked away in a dark corner while the winners basked in the glorious spotlight? Pfft, lmao stop being delusional. Those hardly count as achievements (The Guardian, 2020). Most people won't even blink if you list them all in your beloved portfolio. Yeah, not even those “Finalist of Bakat Muda Sezaman” or “Finalist of UOB Painting of the Year” entries. No one really cares if you didn’t win anything (Artsy, 2017). They’re useless.

“It’s okay. I’ll persevere. Art is subjective. I just haven’t found someone who likes my work yet. But one day, I will.” Uh huh. Keep telling yourself that, idiot. At this point, you’re just burning your hard-earned money. You'd be better off spending it on fireworks or cigarettes. At least those provide some immediate satisfaction. Investments are supposed to yield returns, but churning out more and more artwork just to have it sit in storage collecting dust isn’t an investment. If you can't find someone willing to collect your work within 5 to 10 years of your debut, another decade isn't going to change that (Thornton, 2008).

Let me ask you, why did you want to be an artist to begin with? Was it because Associate Professor [Walter White] told you so? Or because you thought your Bachelor of Fine Arts degree was so useless for anything else other than being an artist? You had just trapped yourself in a very narrow minded worldview. And then when you failed to become an artist, you’ll have no one else to blame but yourself. Let me tell you something: the art scene may look like a rosy garden, but beneath the beautiful scenery and sweet scent lies a path full of thorns. You chose to walk this thorny path without being ready to face the painful moments, even though there are many other paths available for you to take.

The Malaysian art scene in particular, is more like a kampung than a rose garden: small, saturated, and conservative, inhabited with “jaguh tempatan” and ruled by self-appointed lords. Galleries are like neighbors you visit once or twice a season for an exhibition, which is akin to a kenduri. These kenduris are attended by the same people over and over again, so you’re bound to either befriend them or loathe them. And you expect these people to suddenly open their hearts and wallets for your art when there are many others who are either more marketable or more skilled than you? Good luck...

I dare say that the local art market is a bubur lambok potluck; everyone brings their own unique flavor to the table, but only a select few are deemed worthy of a second helping. It’s as if the art scene operates on its own “boleh” logic, where success is measured not by talent alone but by a mysterious recipe of connections, timing, and sheer luck. I can’t help but admire your resilience persisting in your pursuit of recognition, despite facing unsurmountable obstacles that would make Sisyphus question the wisdom of his own eternal task, just as I was...

Yeah, I wrote everything above based on my own experiences as a failed artist. If you want to continue down this thorny path, please, go ahead. But trust me, giving up is also an option. Don’t listen to those successful people bragging about how they made it because they never gave up. They conveniently leave out the important details—the real reasons for their success. More often than not, it's because they were already wealthy, had connections, or simply got incredibly lucky. Bill Gates? He was the son of a wealthy businessman. Ray Kroc? He was a swindler. Mark Zuckerberg? Loads of connections with trust fund kids who attended Harvard University. Steve Jobs? He was...uh.. ruthless... Okay, so we are the 99 percent who must create our success stories from scratch. And being an artist isn't the only way to achieve success.

I’ll give you a name of a “failed” artist. Remember Charles Morin? Of course, you don't. Even Pepperidge Farm doesn't remember him. Because being an artist wasn't meant for him. He was meant for something bigger. So if you can't find success as an artist, don't worry - neither did Charles Morin. Sometimes, giving up on one thing doesn't mean you need to give up on finding your true calling. You may not know Charles Morin as an artist, but you most certainly remember Winston Churchill. Because Charles Morin and Winston Churchill were one and the same. Well, he didn’t actually give up completely; he turned his artistic career into a hobby once he ventured into politics, just like his arch-nemesis in Germany...

Do I manage to convince you to give up being an artist? Great! Congratulations! That’s a bold and brave move. So, what are you going to do with your skills, knowledge, connections, and that Fine Arts degree? A lot of things, actually. Let’s start by examining your skill set.

If you're so good at stringing words together, why not dip your quill into the inkwell of art writing? Instead of concocting grandiose tales about why you paint a cartoonish political clown, dive into the swirling currents of the art scene. Watch the tides of creativity ebb and flow, and pen pieces that capture your observations and musings. Heck, why not take a jab at your old rivals by donning the mantle of an art critic and giving the art world a taste of your wit—just for kicks! Sure, the paycheck might not be as fat as what those pesky artists are hauling in, but at least you won't be hemorrhaging cash on canvas, paint, and brushes. As for the ratio of art writers to artists, let's just say it's like searching for a needle in a haystack. Who needs precise numbers anyway? It's not like anyone's bothered to crunch the data (because, like you, many people want to make artwork instead of researching something, for some reason). And that leads to my next brilliant idea...

If you're the type who gets a thrill from uncovering hidden gems and diving into uncharted territories, becoming a researcher is right up your alley. You don't need to wrap your head around quantum physics or flaunt a fancy PhD to delve into the mysteries of art. All it takes is a healthy dose of curiosity and a hunger for knowledge. Trust me, the art world is a treasure trove of untold stories and untapped secrets just waiting for someone like you to shine a light on them. Take COVID-19, for instance. How much do we really know about its impact on the art scene? Not a whole lot, I'd wager. So why not join forces with me to peel back the layers and uncover the truth? Together, we can pave the way for a brighter, more informed future.

Becoming a leader in writing and research doesn’t fit your personality? Would you rather take a career sitting in a dark room, like your studio? Fret not. Introducing, the illustrious art historian or the elusive art archivist—two more paths ripe for the picking in our grand artistic adventure. Picture it: spending your days knee-deep in dusty tomes, forgotten manuscripts, and exhibition catalogs, unraveling the mysteries of centuries past with the flick of a wrist and the stroke of a pen or keyboard. Or perhaps you fancy yourself as the Indiana Jones of the art world, scouring ancient artworks and hidden archives for clues to unlock the secrets of our Malaysian heritage. But let's not kid ourselves; it's not all glamorous discoveries and thrilling escapades. You'll also be wading through endless piles of paperwork, deciphering cryptic handwriting, and playing detective with missing documents. And don't even get me started on the glamorous world of art archiving—where every day is a battle against dust mites, mold, and the ever-looming threat of paper cuts. But hey, if you've got a penchant for the past and a stomach for the mundane, then who am I to stand in the way of your archival aspirations? After all, someone's gotta keep track of all those masterpieces gathering dust in the attic, right?

Nothing catches your interest so far? Do you still think you are cursed to be a failure? Fear not, dear disillusioned artist! If none of the options above tickle your fancy or the weight of past failures has you contemplating a complete departure from the world of fine art, fret not. You're not alone in this creative crossroads, and there's still a myriad of paths waiting to be explored beyond the confines of the canvas. Perhaps it's time to broaden your horizons and venture into uncharted territories, where your artistic talents can find new outlets and fresh audiences. Think outside the frame and consider unconventional career paths that harness your unique skills and experiences. After all, dropping the mic doesn't have to signify the end of your artistic journey; it could be the prelude to an exciting new chapter filled with unexpected twists and turns.

So, where do you go from here? Well, the possibilities are as vast as the creative cosmos itself. It may be time to embrace your inner entrepreneur and launch a passion project that combines your love for art with other interests or causes close to your heart. Or you're drawn to the world of technology and innovation, where your artistic sensibilities can thrive in the realm of digital design, virtual reality, or augmented reality.

Don't let past setbacks define your future. Sure, you suck as an artist. All you have done might felt like a waste of time. But instead of groveling in depression, view them as valuable lessons that have equipped you with the resilience and determination to navigate whatever challenges lie ahead. Remember, every masterpiece starts with a blank canvas, and every setback is just a brushstroke in the grand tapestry of your artistic journey. So go ahead, drop the mic, and let the world witness the next chapter in your creative evolution. The stage is yours for the taking, and the spotlight awaits your triumphant return.


 

References

The Guardian. (2020, October 6). The art world's shameful truth: Nearly all artists are forced into poverty. The Guardian.

Artsy. (2017, November 2). The true value of art prizes.Artsy. 

Thornton, S. (2008). Seven days in the art world. W. W. Norton & Company.

 


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